Dear Snookies Cookies,

Like Mariah says, I don’t want a lot for Christmas. There is just one thing I need. I don’t care about the presents underneath the Christmas tree. I just want you for my own, more than you could ever know. Make my wish come true, all I want for Christmas is…YOU. Ever since our first encounter a few weeks ago at the office, I can’t stop thinking about you. I keep hoping that I will see you again. Every time I walk into our meeting place, the kitchen, I fantasize about you being there. Maybe another client decided that we deserved you. Maybe someone has been reading my facebook status. But you're never there. Instead, I find tins of Mrs. Beasley’s this and holiday treats that. But nothing else can satisfy my craving for you. Your lightly-browned complexion, chewy texture and delicious chocolate chips really raised the bar. Something about you just makes me smile. Sure I could drive a few miles to Diddy Riese and stand in line behind a bunch of tweens and live out my old days as a Bruin. But nothing compares to your deliciousness. The last time I felt this way was when Mrs. Fields was still good. Until our recent rendezvous, I had lost hope that anyone could make chocolate chip cookies better than my very own recipe. Now, everyday after lunch, I sit at my desk and wonder where you are and who you are spending time with and wish that since I don’t ask for much, this year—someone will bring me YOU. (www.snookies.com)

Dear Random People Who Add Me On FB,

I don't care if your "boyfriend" left a comment on my photo, it does not mean that I want to be your friend. Either you are a girl with 1,543 friends and add anyone and everyone, or a weirdo loner with only 24 friends and a private page, which clearly indicates to me that you are curious to know to who your FB BF is leaving flirty messages for. Either way, I don't need your "friendship" on facebook. If you suspect your man is peeking up the wrong profile pic skirt, I suggest you take that up with him.

While I'm here, just a quick reminder to the guys out there. It is NOT okay, I repeat NOT OKAY for you to research & narrow down the Gilda's in LA & find me on facebook & add me. If I didn't give you my number at the bar, it's probably not likely that I want to see you on my friend request list the next morning.

Oh, and of course, just because you googled this blog & are reading this, it does not make us "friends" and you should not add me on facebook under any circumstances.

Glad we cleared that up.